ESTE COCHE ES UNA RUINA
Articles,  Blog

ESTE COCHE ES UNA RUINA


Hey! What’s up guys? Is everything fine? Everything OK? I’m glad for you! Curious thing is that all of my bedrooms end up looking like this.. yellow tone.. ..this yellowish tone of an elderly’s moustache who smokes ..you know, that elder whose moustache becomes yellow I.. I don’t understand it. Why? What happens? Okay, c’mon, I’m going to tell you the truth, I’m going to tell you a secret This filter you see, this colour you see in my videos, it’s the “AuronPlay colour” Ok, c’mon.. I could easily put this “white”, which is the typical, right? But I think it’s fucking shit(como dalas), don’t you? Then so. I put it, I put it You see? This is a colour now a bit, a bit Blog of ‘talk people into something’ C’mon, improve yourself, follow your dreams… Who cares about that shit? This is Auronplays Colour, no? we go up Look, look, look! C’mon! Let’s go, eh eh eh! Many of you ask me how’s going Afghan subscriber topic that what had happened, which are the news I will tell you in the next video ’cause in this video I’m already a bit angry Some days ago, my father phoned me Yeah, yeah.. I do have a father My mother didn’t get pregnant by the Holy Spirit Although given my squid’s face, my father could perfectly be a cuttlefish But well that’s another issue, we’ll talk later about my squid’s face Well, my father phoned me and said: “Hey Raúl! I’ve been thinking and I wanna change my car. I wanna buy a new car” And I was like- congrats! great! fantastic! incredible! And then he said: “Well, what I wanted to ask you, as you are young and you know about computers, I wanted to know if you’d help me look for one (car) Yes, yes, my dad’s like this people that thinks that I’m a hacker only ’cause I’m young and I’ve got a computer that I surf in the secret archives of the NASA as if one owned the place I believe that my father must be thinking that I spend my afternoons at home hacking… …the archives of the Vatican… …using the database of the Pentagon, or something like that One time, my father, I swear to God, told me “Look, Raúl, an unidentified number called me— As you know what a computer is, can you find the position in Google Maps where the call was from?” And I was thinking, well, who does he think I am?! Mr. Robot or what? That I hack your soul with a cell phone?! that I’m the operator of the emergency number 112 that every time someone calls it marks the position on a map?! but who do you think I am?! Yes, years ago I downloaded the Sims and then thought I was a hacker I put a crack into the sims and I was at home like this {weird music} I went in the street and people said to me, “It’s you. It–it’s you. You are the one who downloaded the sims for free, no?” And I: “Yes, it’s me. I don’t like to tease, either, but yes, it’s me. No no no, no photos, because the FBI is following me, please.” Total, that I deviate from the topic, fuck My father wanted me to help him to find car webpages and that stuff And that’s what I did And it was an issue which I didn’t know about because I’ve never bought a car online I’ve never looked for a car on the Internet My car, I stole it in a Carrefour parking So, I looked for but… what a shit of ads! And me, I complained about the flats’ ones… Me, I complained about the flats ads Well, the cars’ ones are even worse than the others What a shit, dude! So today’s video is about how to hack “The Sims”. No, I’m kidding Today’s video is about curious car ads that I’ve found on the Internet We’re going to start with this one which says: “I sell this car which appearance deceives -mother of God (the ad is bad-written)- It has a little knock I did it parking but it doesn’t matter at all, it doesn’t affect the engine Opportunity. The bargain you were looking for!” Of course, I read this and I say “okay, I don’t mind if it only has a little knock” A little knock doesn’t matter; if it doesn’t affect the engine, there isn’t any problem like it’s said in the ad But of course, then you see the photo and you say:”what the fuck is this?, this car is absolutely broken!” How can you say that you only gave it a small blow in the parking? Is this a little knock? This is the fucking King Africa of the blows! Let’s see… Which parking was? “The Death’s parking” or what? Let’s see, let’s see… You hit the car while parking and the hit usually is like this “Oops!, shit!” The hit has been soft, a quiet and restful hit But this? This isn’t while you were parking! At what speed do you park? At 180 km/h or what? “Look, look, baby! Look how I park the car! Look!” (strange noise) 2nd ad: “A car is sold in good conditions and with a few kilometers, it’s a bit dirty due to its lack of use but it works perfectly” Okay, if you don’t use your car and you park it on the street it’s normal that’s covered with a bit of shit Some pigeons can be shit on your car, or it can be covered by dust, the rain can produce mud… I understand it But what I don’t get into the fucking head is that you say that this car is a BIT dirty Because this car isn’t already a bit dirty This car is already part of the forest! The forest has swallowed the fucking car You get in this car, you open the fucking ashtray and from the ashtray you get a tree, you get a bush full of little flowers, you know? You don’t buy this car from the owner No, no, no. Now the owner is the forest. You have to buy it from the forest You know? You have to sign a contract: “Me, the forest, I sell this vehicle to Mr. Raúl” You open the trunk and you get a gnome You get a gnome from the forest to welcome you to the vehicle Me, I understand perfectly that you don’t use this car too much and it’s covered with a little bit of shit I understand it, it doesn’t matter But what cannot be is that you post a photo of your car which has been swallowed by the jungle 3rd ad: “It’s sold Renault Megane at a good price and with good benefits It has power steering and the windows are opened by themselves” Man! I don’t think they do it by themselves but you mean that they have electric elevations. You press a button and the window goes up I don’t think the window has self-intelligence, it’s self-sufficient to open when it wants to Imagine that you’re going on the highway at 180 km/h and the windows go down… Then you would have a lot of mosquitoes in your face, you know? Well, well, the car looks like it’s ok. It looks good, the sheet is fine I don’t know, I see it good… But I have only a question… Is Lucifer included in the price or do you charge it separately? I say it because it seems that you have the very demon inside your car I don’t know if you realized about that! My friend, who’s inside the car? The Exorcist’s girl or what? You get near the car and she says to you: “(strange noise), buy the car, buy the car! Slut, slut!” Even she vomits you in the face “buy it to me, buy it beehhhhh (vomits). It has a few kilometers, the car is fine” I don’t understand how people takes photos for the ads… Don’t you check them later? Then, when you’re at home, don’t you check your photos on the computer and you say “fuck, maybe the girl of the car shouldn’t be there because she scares, because even she’s pale, for the love of God…” “Big offer!! Car with air conditioner, electric elevations, power steering and demon. Exorcism not included” 4th ad: “It’s sold the car of the photo. As you see, it’s in perfect conditions; MOT and all the papers in order. Free of charges Okay, okay, we’re going to look for the picture Aha Okay Okay, okay, okay… And… which one of all of them is yours, motherfucker? But what’s wrong with people, please?! What’s wrong with people? What do you mean with “selling your car”? What do you mean with looking for the photo to see it? There are a lot of cars! You’ve taken the picture of the whole car park! And I don’t understand anything! Why?! What’s this? Like a game, isn’t it? A riddle, right? “I sell my car at a very good price. Ah! But guess which one is! Hahaha” What a motherfucker, what a motherfucker… This one that we’re going to see now, I don’t if it’s a joke or true but I think that’s absolutely fantastic 5th ad: “I sell a tuned Honda Civic, with radiactive-coloured alloy wheels but without radiation… You feel safe inside the car I hope you have your dick in good conditions because with this car you’re going to fuck a half Spain” This gentleman or this lady wants to tell us through this ad that with this car it’s easy to flirt a lot, okay? You can flirt a lot so you can fuck a half Spain, right? Let’s see… I don’t want to say nothing, I’m not anyone to judge but I don’t know if with that colour for the alloy wheels this car is a method to flirt more, okay? I don’t know what to say to you If you suddenly find this car, it burns your retina and your eyes with that colour 6th ad: “I change my car for a Nintendo Switch, not for a Nintendo Wii because it’s already old and I don’t want it” This person is clear, he doesn’t want Wii. He says that’s from another time and that stuff and he doesn’t like it anymore He wants the Switch in exchange for the car Well, the exchange isn’t bad, right? He gives you a car which has been in a place where a nuclear explosion has happened and you give him a Nintendo Switch. It’s a change a bit crazy but it isn’t bad. You can use this car to take car pieces from it if any of them still worth or you can use it to put it in your ass, motherfucker. Let’s see… I understand that people want to sell their car and they do it on the Internet and that stuff but dude, people uploads some photos… People posts some ads… that you say “this way, how are you going to sell your car, please?!” Anyway, I hope that you have laughed with the video at least, because that’s what matters I love this kind of videos, I enjoy them a lot And if you want a second part of this, you already know what you have to do, right? Support this video! By the way, before I go. You remember the interview I did to 8cho (another youtuber) on Squad channel, right? Okay, so I’ve done another one to Hamza, the “kitipasa” of the balls who you can like or not but I considered that it would be quite interesting to know a bit more about him, okay? And in addition, I give him a ticking off in the interview because this guy, we have to admit he’s a bit cocky, uh? So if you want to watch it, you have the link below. I think you’re going to like it. Come on! See you next time, friends!

100 Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *